STACITA.

According to CNet, Forbes.com retracted an article from its Web site on Wednesday that was titled "Don't marry career women."

The article, written by Forbes.com executive editor Michael Noer, included excerpts from a series of social science papers and reported that long work hours for women consistently increase the odds of a divorce but similar jumps in men's work hours often don't.

By itself, summarizing the relatively dry sociology literature probably wouldn't have drawn much of a response. But Noer was intentionally flip, advising in the first paragraph of his article: "Guys: A word of advice.... Whatever you do, don't marry a woman with a career." Outrage (mostly predictable) soon ensued.

This shit WORRIES me. I'm freaking 28 years old and after seeing my friends drop one by one, get married, have babies, I kindasortamaybe want that too. But, now, this MORON says that my marriage is sure to fail?!? Basically, he is advancing the notion that my last three years and career aspirations are for shit? Well, screw him.

Throughout law school, the hot topic has always been balancing work and family for women. As one of my friend's noted, the same pressure exists for men, but the consequences are just different. While that may be true, what Mr. Noer is advancing places marrying-aspiring women in a complex position - it essentially advocates to the men that we may very likely marry that his wife should either end her career (happens) or face divorce (happens). Either way, it's shitty because many women and men are constantly figuring out how to support one another as husbands and wives in a fair and equal partnership, and this just rips that to shit. Way to go, Forbes.

Maybe, however, his article should not have been so one-sided. Maybe, instead, his article should have been also been directed at women -- Girls, don't marry a man with a career. What would that piece have looked like? Why wasn't that part of his argument... because I think that has ALSO merit. See Miranda-Steve Effect, supra.* Instead, it was the assumption that the MEN always have the career and that WOMEN are stumbling into this new work sphere. The blatant sexism is there, screeching, "women's fault, women's fault, women's fault." Get over it, Noer, we want both... but now, maybe we just don't want YOU. 

I say go for it. You have two career-driven spouses, sacrifice a la Bill and Hilary. You have one career-driven spouse, support each other AND the marriage. Women, we can have it both ways. We just need these boys to step it up. 

* Miranda-Steve Effect is my new term for the relationship that I think will survive best in this post-feminism world. I would like to note that this theory deserves a separate entry, but the Bar Exam ironically interrupted its posting potential. The theory involves Miranda, one of the sexy foursome from SATC was a Harvard-graduate, partner-in-the-law-firm type who eventually fell in love and married Steve, the adorable, devoted, funny bartender. They had a baby and made it work, given their alternative schedules. Yes, it's TV, but it's a damn good model to aspire to for the working woman who is put off by her supposed intellectual contemporaries pursuing the secretary ass because he is threatened by our intelligence, ambition, and drive. For more examples of this intellectual contemporary I describe, see Mr. Noer-dipshit.